Image by L.E. Wilson from RedBubble based on work by mattar from Pixabay
Did you know that you don’t need to be happy all the time? In fact, how could it be good for us to expect or demand that we be in a state of contentment and bliss every single day? The brain needs a break from stimulation. Actually we adapt to all kinds of input precisely because being psyched up all the time would be exhausting and untenable. We get used to novelty relatively quickly for good reason. It’s not long before we stop smelling freshly baked bread, for example, and any new environment or object within soon becomes background so that we can be alerted to any changes.
Yet, we believe that we should be happy all the time, so much so that we seek it everyday. And some of us do so in maladaptive ways, for example, by seeking the “highs” of illicit drugs or alcohol1, and/or overindulging in unhealthy foods or risky behavior that seem to promise a jolt of happiness.
But why the obsession with only feeling good? Going down this path will leave us unprepared for what life will inevitably deliver, which will include moments of sadness, of frustration, of pain, of anger. Experiencing the whole range of emotions is what makes us human and able to develop more sophisticated responses such as empathy, problem solving, resilience, and personal growth.
Here is where pondering the life and times of a musical genius such as Brian Wilson, who reached the highest levels of celebrity and fame while struggling with anxiety, addiction and depression, is instructive.
Brian Wilson: I Just Wasn’t Made for These Times (1995) is a documentary directed by Don Was about the life of musical genius Brian Wilson, who was one of the founders and the lead songwriter for the famed American rock band, The Beach Boys.
Life Lesson: You don’t need to be happy all the time.
🍿Movie Scene Link (movie quote)
Imagine being able to write the most joyful and cheerful music and at the same time create music that is deeply introspective, moving, and touching. Obviously, such a person would need to feel the full depth of all the emotions that are available to us. The result is music that soothes, that provides solace, that allows your inner child to come out and play. But perhaps most importantly, when you are feeling down, this is music that will let you know with certainty that everything is going to be alright.
If you’ve never listened to The Beach Boys, do yourself a favor and take a moment to experience the magic of finding out through their music who and what you are — a dynamic, all encompassing person who is not afraid of boredom or melancholy and can therefore soar with joy and lightness when natural life events call for it.
Enjoy!
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Please, just say, “No” to drugs.
Love Brian Wilson and the Beach Boys. I look forward to watching the documentary.