Are You Making The Best Of It?
The Wisdom of "Singin’ In The Rain" (1952)
Image by L.E. Wilson from RedBubble based on work by pixel2013 on Pixabay
When someone you care about makes a decision you disagree with, one inclination might be to wish them well nonetheless, or to hope that the decision results in their happiness anyway. It’s perhaps a way to console ourselves when we think that the person is making a mistake. This thought, of course, we also apply to ourselves. When we make decisions, it is with the implicit hope that eventually it will result in more happiness for us.
But thinking in terms of absolute happiness may not be the healthiest way to approach life choices. Any reflection on our past will likely reveal that we adapted to the level of happiness we tried to achieve at an earlier time, only to then look for another, higher, level. This phenomenon is known as the “hedonic treadmill”. Essentially, we’re never very happy for long, and the satisfaction gained from something is soon forgotten, only to be replaced by more pining and more striving. But this is actually a good thing because it pushes and motivates us to grow, to explore, to learn. If we were completely happy with the first stimulus that made us feel contentment, then we may never have gotten out of our cribs as babies. We’d still just be happily enjoying the environment of our rooms and doing nothing else.
However, the search for absolute happiness is a bit of a curse, a trap. The question really ought to be “are you making the best of it?,” which is more empowering, rather than “are you happy?,” which is more passive. You can’t really control how you feel about something. We receive all kinds of input that can cause us to feel negative emotions, whether it is a piece of news, or how someone talks to us, or what a person says to us, or does to us, or how someone we know is treated. Every time we interact with the world there is a risk of being aggrieved, some of us (who are maybe too sensitive) more so than others.
In a way, emotions are hoisted upon us, like a surprise attack. But the emotions we feel are just how our bodies react to new information, and this mostly occurs beyond our conscious control, so it’s a bit unfair and unrealistic to expect ourselves to always feel contentment and happiness. But what a difference it makes to reframe what we’re experiencing with the question, “are you making the best of it?” or, “how can you make the best of it?”
So while we can’t control a negative reaction our bodies have to disappointing news or negative experiences, we can refocus or minds toward healthier choices by asking ourselves how we can make the best of a bad situation or work with what we have. A bad trip can be salvaged; it can still lead to happy memories. A disappointing outcome can be a learning experience. A bout of self-doubt can lead to new interests. The theme here is resiliency, positivity, and embracing the idea that “there is no bad news; there are only blessings in disguise.” It’s the sentiment expressed in the song, and the movie musical, Singin’ in the Rain (1952).
I'm singing in the rain, just singin' in the rain
What a glorious feeling—I'm happy again
I'm laughing at clouds, so dark up above
The sun's in my heart and I'm ready for love
The image here is of actor Don Lockwood (Gene Kelly) tap dancing, splashing, and singing in the pouring rain. He’s making the best of the situation. In other words, why not enjoy what you can while in a metaphorical rain, rather than only focusing on the negative aspects of it and accentuating the misery?
Singin’ in the Rain (1952) is a comedy co-directed by Stanley Donen and Gene Kelly about Don Lockwood (Gene Kelly), a Hollywood superstar who falls in love with a dancer, Kathy Delden (Debbie Reynolds), which he tries to hide from his jealous onscreen partner Lina Lamont (Jean Hagen).
Life Lesson: Make the best of every situation.
🍿Movie Scene Link (movie quote)
There is another stunning scene in this movie, and it’s one of the most impressive sequences ever committed to film. It’s an amazing feat of acrobatics and comedy. You really must, must, must see Singin’ in the Rain just for this scene, which reinforces the same message: make the best of it, sing in the rain, dance in the rain. And of course it’s done through a song called, “Make ‘em Laugh”
Though the world’s so full of a number of things, I’m sure we should all be as happy as—, but are we? No. Definitely, no. Positively, no. Decidedly, no. Uh-uh. Short people have long faces, and long people have short faces. Big people have little humor, and little people have no humor at all. And in the words of that immortal bard Samuel J. Snodgrass, as he was about to be led to the guillotine, “Make ‘em laugh, make ‘em laugh. Don’t you know everyone wants to laugh?”
Don’t YOU want to laugh? Don’t you want to let go of pain? “Don’t you want to finish the story? Let it all go and have a life that is not dictated by the past?” This last quote is from a beautiful speech by Walt Disney (Tom Hanks) in the movie Saving Mr. Banks (2013), which is another movie that essentially asks, “are you making the best of a bad situation?” We’re all figuratively headed toward “the guillotine”, to our demise, to our end. All of us, everyone who has ever lived, will eventually die. We all know this, which means we’re all on this same death march. Shouldn’t we make the best of it as much as possible, and as often as we can?
A final song along these lines in Singin’ in the Rain is called, “Good Morning,” which is another anthem of positivity:
Good Morning! Sun beams will soon smile through
Good Morning, Good Morning to you, and you, and you, and you
Good Morning! Good Morning!
We've gabbed the whole night through
Good Morning, Good Morning to you
In the morning, in the morning
It's great to stay up late
Good Morning, Good Morning to you!
What a great way to start the day—the first day of the rest of your life. So, why not make the best of it? What if it’s all we can do? What if it’s all we need to do to make our lives even better?
What if it’s the best tool we have?
And what if it allows us to discover the meaning of life?
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I agree with you about happiness. Sometimes it takes a lot of work to be happy! I like the idea of allowing ourselves to feel emotions, even though those are sometimes emotions of sadness, pain, or anger. They are real. But they don't need to define the rest of our lives. Maybe that's where your 'make the best of it' comes in.