Fake It Till You Make It!

Another Way To Succeed, According To The Movies

Sep 27, 2022

A cartoon theater stage is flanked by a sad, drama mask on one side, and a happy, comedy mask on the other.

Image by L.E. Wilson from RedBubble based on work by OpenClipart-Vectors and Mohamed Hassan on Pixabay

We are what we pretend to be, so we must be careful about what we pretend to be.

Perhaps you have experienced the awkwardness of trying something new. And perhaps you have also learned that many things need a period of adjustment in order for them to feel natural or comfortable.

Do you remember the first time you had to shake hands with someone like an adult and not a kid? Did it feel strange? Or, do you remember the first time you had to give a work presentation and know that people were relying on you for your expertise? Did that feel odd? It makes sense if those things were a bit unsettling because anything that takes us out of the familiar is going to cause that awkward feeling, what some people may even call “impostor syndrome.” But it’s probably completely reasonable to feel strange, or to not know how one is supposed to feel, or to feel a bit phony when incorporating a new behavior or a new activity.

However, we can’t grow without trying new things or without feeling the discomfort that comes from taking risks. And we can’t adjust to a new behavior if we don’t keep repeating it. Eventually, shaking hands with people feels perfectly natural, and if your job requires it, giving presentations is just something you do and it becomes completely normal. The simple truth is that sometimes you have to “fake it till you make it,” or as psychologist Amy Cuddy puts it, “fake it till you become it.”

The characters in movies who pretend to be someone they are not are usually endearing because we understand or empathize with their motivation to do so. Here are a few movies where pretending eventually leads to reward:

The School of Rock (2003) is a comedy directed by Richard Linklater about Dewey Finn (Jack Black), a lazy, self-centered, amateur musician who impersonates a teacher, Ned Schneebly (Mike White), and enlists his students to compete in a Battle of the Bands.

Life Lesson: Do what you love because you love it. Even if you are not very good at it, you can find a way to fit it into your life.
- 🍿Movie Scene Link (movie quote)

This movie is the quintessential “fake it till you make it” story. It’s about a guy who pretends to be a teacher and because of that becomes one of the best teachers his students have ever had. It seems that there are many jobs that officially have a number of hurdles one must pass through to be admitted into the field, but which drains the passion right out of the candidates. Sometimes, then, an amateur produces better results than a professional.

Air Guitar Nation (2006) is a documentary directed by Alexandra Lipsitz about the first U.S.A. competitors, C-Diddy (David S. Jung) and Björn Türoque (Dan Crane), entering the World Air Guitar Championship in Oulu, Finland, which has been held since 1996.

Life Lesson: Follow your passion even if others disapprove or don’t understand it. They will come around when you demonstrate skill.
- 🍿Movie Scene Link (movie quote)

Playing air guitar may be the ultimate expression of make-believe, and being able to do so on stage in front of an audience and rock out because of it is quite literally living the dream. What a great reminder to enjoy life like a child. And not surprisingly, putting yourself in a position where you are doing something new, learning something new, can move you into that mindset.

Tropic Thunder (2008) is a comedy co-written and directed by Ben Stiller about Tugg Speedman (Ben Stiller), an insecure actor playing the lead character in a badly made Vietnam War movie based on a book by Four Leaf Tayback (Nick Nolte).

Life Lesson: Know who you are.
- 🍿Movie Scene Link (movie quote)

Actors of course must necessarily role-play and pretend. Obviously this is a skill that is honed by many years of practice, but the ability to embody the flexible mindset of an actor can be very useful in real life since we truly do have to maneuver a variety of environments and situations that require us to act differently. And what better way to practice a new behavior or personality than by studying and taking on a character from a great movie?

I Ain’t Scared of You: A Tribute to Bernie Mac (2011) is a humorous documentary directed by Robert Small about comedian and award winning TV/film actor, Bernie Mac, a man who embodied rugged individualism and achieved the quintessential American Dream despite numerous obstacles and personal tragedies.

Life Lesson: Love yourself enough to be the person you want to become.
- 🍿Movie Scene Link (movie quote)

Imagine being a regular person with a regular job and having a regular family. How does such a person become a performer, a celebrity, a creator? To start a career as a standup comic, a regular person one day has to decide to get on stage in front of a crowd and just do it. This act truly embodies “fake it till you become it,” and it’s very illuminating to watch a documentary like this that takes you on that journey.

You must be the person you have never had the courage to be. Gradually, you will discover that you are that person, but until you can see this clearly, you must pretend and invent.

― Paulo Coelho

The individuals in the movies above serve as models of how we can go about trying a new behavior. And they also serve as reminders to be kind to ourselves as we’re going through an awkward stage while attempting something unfamiliar—which takes a good amount of courage and self-confidence in and of itself. We have to act as if we are the person we need to be, which will feel odd at first, but eventually, if given enough practice, we do become this new version of ourselves. So while you’re going through the awkward stage, don’t see it as phony, see it as growing.

But remember: never lie to yourself.

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